Derek's mother passed away Tuesday morning after a brief fight with multiple myeloma (a blood and bone marrow cancer) and amyloidosis. If you read about the conditions you will know, as we did, that the prognosis was grim, however we thought we had much more time with her than we did and we are all so very sad.

I wrote this the day she died:

Sally Jane Washburn Smith Cottrell

February 16, 1954-June 17, 2008

She was a daughter, sister, wife, partner, mother of two, step-mother of two, grandmother of three, friend to all. She was a runner, swimmer, hiker, biker, and brown belt in tae kwan do. She was spirited and independent, with a bawdy sense of humor. She loved bad puns. She laughed often.

She liked to order salads or sneak tofu into a meal, but she also polished off the occasional bag of chips or container of fluff. She lived life to the fullest. She was brave. She pushed herself to do more. She kept learning. She was a survivor.

She was compassionate and caring. She taught women to nourish and nurture their babies, to listen to those babies and to their own hearts. She helped them birth, welcomed many souls into this world, and even caught some in her own hands. She helped others who were aging, sick, or ready to leave this life.

As she moved from place to place within this world, across a country, across a sea, she met many people and left a lasting impression on them all. She helped so many, and did so much good, that there is no doubt her spirit lives on within us all. 

With Lily on Mother's Day, May 11th: 

With Aden on June 5th, a few days after her arrival at the university hospital near us: 

With her sons Drew and Derek when they moved her to the oncology floor on June 11th:

With Ronan on her last "good day," Friday, June 13th: 

2 hours into summer break and I am already frustrated with my kids! I am not usually a fan of parenting books, but I think it might be time to read some. I understand Lily's defiance and stubbornness but I am having a tough time understanding/getting through to Aden. I spend more time arguing with him than having fun with him. What is going on with 7-year-olds? What they are thinking/needing developmentally? I want to avoid 1) spending the summer yelling and nagging; 2) letting him veg out in front of the TV or computer all summer because it is easier than dealing with him.

Oh, and what is up with bathroom talk? Lily and Aden both think it is hysterical right now. I alternate between ignoring it (if I don't respond it won't be as much fun, right?), limiting it ("That is bathroom talk, if you want to talk like that go into the bathroom"), or going crazy and snapping at them to stop it right this second! Not surprisingly, my inconsistency isn't very effective...

In the interest of my sanity, I am trying to set goals for our summer. So far we are planning to go to the library quite a bit, and we each picked something we want to learn about. Aden wants to learn more about "how plants make oxygen." Lily wants to learn to read. :) And I think I am going to check out books about flowers and planning flower gardens--I can always dream about a future where I have time to garden again!

But not this summer... this summer I am going to be busy keeping Ronan out of everything! He can officially move across a room and into another one, or get to anything on the floor that he wants. He is funny to watch. He gets onto his hands and feet, walks his feet towards his hands, then moves his hands forward once or twice, face plants, repeats. Or he gets onto hands and knees, moves his hands forward once or twice, belly splats, repeats. Some combination of the two motions can get him across a room pretty efficiently now. He often sits up in between movements, in order to better position himself for his next forward attack LOL. Sometimes he props himself up on his feet/knees and one hand while reaching up with his other hand... I don't think it will be long before he figures out how to pull himself up (ETA yeah, he pulled up to standing on Friday, just two days after my OP). Siblings provide a lot of incentive! You've got to keep up with them, and they are moving targets after all, plus they move all the best toys away from you...

Ronan is eating real food already too! We're just kind of following his lead, mostly skipping spoon feeding in favor of letting him try whatever he can put into his mouth. Two weeks ago he still spit things back out, but now he eats whatever he can get his hands on and wants more. So far he's had banana, avocado, rice crackers, cheerios, pizza crust, bread, and rice chex. And a few tastes of yummy things like hummus, the sauce on my chinese food, and ice cream. :)

Hard to believe he is not even 6 months old yet but already doing so much! I'm sad my baby is growing up so quickly, but being able to move and eat makes him so content that I really can't complain. Really, he is just the happiest baby and I feel so lucky. I just find it ironic that he was in no hurry at all to be born, but seems to be in such a hurry to grow up now! Making up for lost time, I guess.

Evidence #1: Look at what is currently living in our basement: 

Aden found these 5 feral kittens in our neighbor's storage area. The mother is so wild that we cannot get near her, but we took the kittens (about 6 weeks old) and are hoping to tame them so they can grow up to be fat, happy housecats who do not further contribute to the feral cat population. We've had them a week now and they are still skittish but we can hold them all, they will eat from our hands, and they will come out and play when we are in the room with them.

I needed 5 more things to feed and clean up after, right?! In the last few weeks I've felt very stressed and have often found myself thinking that having a third child was crazy (and almost wishing we hadn't done it). But now... Has anyone else read the fable where a family is unhappy in their small, crowded house, and the wise woman keeps advising them to bring more and more animals inside to live with them? It gets more and more crowded and they get more and more unhappy. Then finally she tells them to send all the animals back outside, and their small house suddenly feels so much bigger, and it is perfect after all. These kittens may be the universe's way of reminding me that my life is pretty damn perfect after all. 

Perhaps I will appreciate the lesson more after the kittens find homes? ;)

Evidence #2 that I'm in for it:

Four-and-a-half-month-old babies are not supposed to do that, are they??? Ronan can currently roll both ways, scoot backwards across the room, and pivot on his tummy to reach things.

And he got his first tooth last week. My baby is growing up so fast!